So. Been a long time. Sorry. Signed in a couple of times with the intent of catching you up and then just couldn’t find the energy to write down all that’s been happening. I’ll finally present it here, but in a nutshell, because there’s no reason you need the gory details.
Suffice to say that Mom had been fitting in nicely at her new place. She’d even begun to make friends (the two ladies she shared a dining table with) and was as happy as a person could reasonably expect to be in such a situation. It was nice.
Then the pain started in her leg. Nothing major at first, but it rapidly escalated into something that would have driven her to her knees had she been allowed to fall. X-rays showed squat and her PCP (who I’m not certain I’m feeling so warm and fuzzy about anymore) didn’t seem inclined to follow-up. Five days after those results, I got a call from the facility telling me that she was in so much pain, they felt I should take her to the emergency room. So I did and one CT scan later we learn that she has a compression fracture in the lumbar spine.
How did it happen? Who knows. She might have fallen getting up in the night to pee. Being that she has the Alzheimer’s, it’s not likely she’d remember the fall, so there’s no way of knowing. Or it’s that she’s nearly 91 and as osteoporosis and it just happened. Anyway, it’s there, so now what?
The Hospitalist (Dr. Ma, a WONDERFUL man) contacted a local surgeon. Too many days later, we learned that he doesn’t do spinal surgery. I called his office asking for help and a terrific woman named Terry called on my behalf to the surgeon who does do spinal surgery and gave my name to their office person, Chris. I called Chris. Doctor is away until the 15th and has NO openings, but she’ll give me the first one she has. Okay, I’m thinking. That’ll have to work even though my mother is so toked up on pain-killers that her own personality has nearly vanished. Chris calls me back. She took it upon herself to ask a patient to reschedule so she could get my mother in! Unheard of and amazing and I am so grateful to her. So in two days we head out to meet the surgeon and see what he has to say.
Could be anything, because Mom is undoubtedly failing. She’s lost ten pounds since the end of September, weight that she can’t afford to lose. Thanks to the pain meds, she’s a zombie – flat affect, eyes barely focusing. She knows me, although I’m not certain she could say my name on a bet, but that’s about it. And forget about conversation. Nothing makes sense and I surf the tide of her words with a precarious hold on my board.
So that’s where we are. It breaks my heart to see her, and reduced me to tears. For her sake, I want this over. This is not the life she wanted, not the end she envisioned, and nothing can help her but Time.